I'm sorry for my absence in this space. My father passed away and I am sad and depressed and haven't felt like posting. I'll start posting again soon but it may be a bit sporadic for awhile.
My father was brave and smart and handsome. He was charming, generous, and witty. He was a true gentleman. He was our rock and our light and not just a father but a friend. He was a daily part of our lives and was more like a father than a grandfather to my children since their father isn't around. His loss has left a huge hole in all our lives.
He was diagnosed with brain cancer (CNS lymphoma) almost exactly a year ago and had been doing really well with chemotherapy, so well that even the doctor had declared him cancer free in December. In February, we started noticing similar symptoms to when he was originally diagnosed so we took him to the doctor for a CT scan. The next day they told us the cancer had come back with a vengeance and he had between two weeks and three months to live. He died two weeks and one day later.
I go from feeling completely numb to unbearable raw grief so deep that it's hard to breathe. Writing about it is difficult but I wanted to share what a wonderful person he was and what he meant to us.
I always look for silver linings in dark times and I am so happy that my father didn't suffer, that he had almost no pain, that we got a year with him when it could have gone the other way, that we could be with him until the end and that he was loved and admired by so many. I also appreciate the emails asking me if all is well, you are so kind and thoughtful, thank you.
My father, me, and my daughter.
My father with my daughter when she got her black belt in karate.
My father with my oldest son in Moab.
My father with my youngest son.